Death in the Village

I know that's kind of a morbid title, but it's what I've been doing for the past week.  And it has been taking a lot of my time and energy.  My aide and friend, Stella, her sister-in-law Malea died.  It's a very sad story that Malea's husband died unexpectedly last year from stomach problems and Malea has been fighting cancer for a couple years.  She came home from Anchorage about 2 weeks ago because the doctors said there was nothing left for them to do for her.  She had four children: the oldest girl, a boy at boarding school, a 6th grade boy here in EMO, and a four-year-old boy.  It was the worst to watch those kids go through this.

Stella texted me Sunday night at 3:40am saying that Malea had passed a couple hours ago.  It has hit us hard in the village because she was a very strong and wonderful woman.  I took food over to them on Tuesday and talked for a few short minutes.  The custom in the village is that the family has 3 days of viewing in the home with the body and then the funeral is on the 4th days.  Then they bury the body and have an eskimo dance.

I begged my principal to allow me to go to the funeral because of how close I am to the family.  There were many teachers and aides already asking to go, but I felt it was right for me to go because I'm close with the siblings of Malea, even though I didn't teach the children.  In the end, I was able to go to half of the funeral.  The principals took turns going and I went for the second half.  After school, I took food over to Ray and Lauri's house again (Stella's parents-where everyone was meeting and eating everyday).  They insisted that I stayed and ate with them.  They then asked me if I was going to bury the body the next day. I explained that I had to work and that I felt it was just for family.  They told me that I could take the day off and that anyone was welcome.  They encouraged me to come.  So, in the end, I took a half day off of work and helped Stella get ready and headed out with them.

This is Malea's middle son and two of her sister-in-laws (Stella is the one on the right).

Stella's husband, David, and their niece

Malea's family

We had an Eskimo dance on Thursday night.  It was beautiful.  Then I went over to Stella's house to help her cook for the dinner the next day at camp.  I didn't get to bed until about 12:30am.  Then I woke up at 8am to give a couple of students some tests before I was going to head over to Stellas.  I ended up staying at work until 11am putting out fires and helping everyone with stuff.  So, I only took a half day.  I then headed over to Stella's house with all my snow, winter, and rain gear for the trip.  Her kids kept looking at me on the couch like I was a zombie.  She gave me her cold so I was feeling like crap already.

We headed off to camp at around 1pm.  We took boats (probably about 10 in all).  I rode with Stella, her husband David, her brother Zeke, and her sons Cunnie, Coco, and Stephen.  I sat toward the front of the boat so it was pretty bumpy and now my body aches...urgh.  We got to camp and got right to work.  The women were getting the food and things sorted out while the men walked over to the grave site.

We stopped halfway to camp to take a break...I think it was a smoking break...

Stella's boys...David, Stephen, Cunnie, and Coco

Stella's brother Zeke.  This is the first time I met Zeke (he doesn't come around a lot) and he is deaf.  I thought I knew a lot of simple sign language and that I could get by...I learned how much I really DON'T know.  They said they'd teach me:).

Getting to camp

It was about 10 men/boys taking turns digging the grave for about an hour.  As soon as they were done, they came into the house, warmed up a little, and then we all went down for the burial.  I took pictures for the family so that I can give them a memory.  It was very touching to watch it all.  There were probably 50 people there.  Between her oldest son standing in the background, her middle son helping to dig, and her youngest son (4) helping to bury her with a racket that he found, it was all very touching.  She now lies next to her husband, Hondo.

I don't know who is in the back (I can't see their face).  But I was moved to see Malea's middle boy watching his cousins dig his mom's grave.  It was a very moving experience.  Cunnie and Rudy are helping here.

More pictures of them digging.

It was very humbling to watch them bury her.  In Michigan, the grave is dug out when you get there, there is a rug to stand on, a mechanism to help lower the body into the ground...it's much more smooth.  In the bush, I was able to see the family work as a team to dig by hand and shovel, put a tarp around the inside of the grave, have her nephews and brothers put her casket into a box, watch her sons and daughter screw the box shut, see them put rope around the bottom of the box, and watch them work as a team to move her into the grave and lower her down.  Then the whole family (including myself when I was told I had to) throw dirt on her grave to help bury her.  It was very moving and humbling.

Lowering the casket into the box

Covering the casket

Malea's daughter screwed the first screw

Then her middle son

Then her oldest son

Her oldest son placed the cross/marker at the grave

Then they started lowering the casket

And worked as a team

And lowered it down

Everyone threw in a handful of dirt

Her sons and nephews helping to fill the grave

Her littlest son was fun to watch and it was great to have that memory for the family of him helping to bury his mother.

Malea's family

We then ate at the house, cleaned up, and were on our way back home.  On our way back, we saw a seal.  There were about 8 boats chasing it.  It was AMAZING to watch the Natives chase seal in their customs.  To see them work together, the determination on their faces, and to see how fun it was for them.  I loved it.  By far, it was my favorite thing I've done here yet.  I say that, but then I think of everything else.  It's amazing to see everything. :)  Every new experience is another great day.

Stephen, Coco, and Cunnie chasing seal

There were a bunch of boats

The boys hunting

Throwing a spear

Other boats are ready to chase